CASE STUDIES #2: Sending RIGHT and CLEAR signal

Last Sunday I was dining with my father at a foodcourt.

At the next table, two boys were running around, shouting and shoving each other. Their father sat at the table, looked away and ignored the ruckus.

"When you all (referring to my siblings and I) behaved like that in the past, I'd sure whack. I cannot tolerate this kind of behaviour," commented my dad.

That sets me thinking:
Is that why we KNOW what is the appropriate behaviour?
Is that why some students will make noise and walk around when lesson is going on while others know when to do the right things at the right time?
By ignoring their negative patterns, are parents signaling that their behaviour is acceptable?

A few years ago, I taught a teenage girl. She is very smart and was from a top school. At 13-year-old, she had a boyfriend who is much older than her. On one hand, her parents expressed strong objection to the relationship to us. On the other hand, according to the girl, her parents invited the boy to her house and even had outings together with her and her boyfriend.

Maybe her parents are doing this to keep watch of her movements. Maybe her parents did not tell her CLEARLY what they REALLY feel, fearing that it might break their bond. However, to the girl, she felt that her parents are approving of her relationship.

Maybe it is because the RIGHT MESSAGE was NOT COMMUNICATED properly, the girl became an unwed mother at the age of 14.